I should shut up

I held my face in ice water for 40 seconds this morning. woo hoo! I'm getting better at this.

I am bored with my job. I mean, I've been bored with it almost from day one, but so grateful to be earning a paycheck I didn't care. But I'm starting to really be bummed out by the feeling that my life is being spent this way, sitting in front of a computer doing the same boring things every day, leaving me with very little energy in the evenings to do anything for myself.

But I have no idea how else to support myself so I can keep making high-level fine art (read: expensive materials and lots of space required) and keep a roof over my head. Bah. I suppose there are worse fates, and I am aware that my current life as a non-struggling artist in Berlin is the dream of many, many people and the fact that I am actually here doing this oh my God I should just shut the fuck up.

I am hungry for lunch but can not eat for another hour. boo