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[personal profile] alcippe
I told him I didn't want to drink/smoke/fuck with him tonight (could we maybe just go for a walk and then get dinner instead?) and he had to think about it really hard. And then he told me he couldn't decide and would call me back later.

Just a piece of goddamn meat. After 4 years I'm still just a piece of goddamn Sunday meat.
And sometimes I need that too, it's not all one way. But I think I'm getting tired of it. At the very least, we should just call it what it is: friends with benefits.

I think to myself, "while I'm in Chicago, either I'm with him or I'm alone." And that's the truth of it. I ain't gonna be starting any new relationships as long as I stay in this City. So maybe it's time to start packing.

I hurt a lot right now.
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